Backport of Various race condition and test fixes. into release/1.17.x #20216
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Backport
This PR is auto-generated from #20212 to be assessed for backporting due to the inclusion of the label backport/1.17.
The below text is copied from the body of the original PR.
This PR fixes various test flakes / failures. Notably, it introduces a new check to test agent initialization that will wait for the bootstrap process to complete successfully before unblocking (which I suspect was causing a large number of flakes in tests globally).
It appears that there may have been a race condition in some of the peering state store logic due to the object not being cloned before mutation, which was flagged in tests. It doesn't appear to be a code path that would be encountered outside of our tests (which inserts partial data).
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